I look around and see nothing but the sickening fishbowl we live in. preconstructed meals, precontructed buildings, preconstructed areas, preconstructed smiles. there is nothing real anymore. all of this was made for us to consume, to keep us content. we slowly consume one another, no longer interacting as we should, we have been reduced to consumers of all types and flavors of slop. some slop is food, some slop is people, some slop is environments. i feel the spinning of the merry go round whipping and whipping me round. I can never get off, instead I must live on this cruise ship, live in the carnival, and play my part as the joyful little resort visitor i am. I cant stand to use the company dollars anymore. I want out, i hate it here